This is one of the good days.
One of the good weeks.
I’m happy. I’m positive.
My thoughts are calm and in peace.
Although its one of those stressful weeks it been good.
I’ve kept it together. And I feel good.
But…that fear is still there.
Because I know…that this is only temporarily.
My brain will find a way to make it all go away.
This feeling, these happy thoughts will be gone soon.
So I guess I’ll enjoy them now.
Before I’m back to reality.
I feel so alone.
I feel like I don’t matter.
I can’t focus on one thought.
I feel alone.
I feel like crying.
I have no one in my life right now.
I’ve pushed everyone away.
Everyone hates me.
I think I’d be better off dead.
But I don’t wanna die
I’m scared of death.
I just want to be happy.
I wanna have friends.
Real friends who care about me.
Real friends that wont’t run away.
Someone who gets me.
Someone to fix me.
I keep thinking that if I were pretty
the world would love me.
My eating disorder is killing me.
I hate everything.
I hate myself.
Right now, I wish I were someone else.
Somewhere else.
I wish these bad thoughts would go away.